


Return the Favor

by Hellfirre



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Minor Akaashi Keiji/Bokuto Koutarou, Minor Kuroo Tetsurou/Tsukishima Kei, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-15
Updated: 2021-03-15
Packaged: 2021-03-23 13:46:57
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,140
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30056385
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hellfirre/pseuds/Hellfirre
Summary: “I’m not nervous, idiot,” Iwaizumi says defensively. Of course he would call Oikawa an idiot right before confessing to him, what was wrong with him?
Relationships: Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru
Kudos: 4





	Return the Favor

Someone had once told Iwaizumi that love was a choice. They had said that love was a conscious decision that a person made every day, and that love was something that needed to be worked for, every single day. Iwaizumi is sure by now that the person who told him that was a liar. If love was a choice, he would not have chosen to be in love with his best friend. If love was  a choice, he would not have chosen Oikawa Tooru. 

In the darkness of his room, the night before his third and final year of high school, Iwaizumi is sitting alone. He’s spent all night thinking about the upcoming day of school tomorrow, and the thoughts haven’t stopped. He looks at his alarm clock for the third time this hour. 10:47. Thinking more about it, he is beginning to realize it's not the first day of school that scares him. It's the last. He knows that tomorrow will be the start of the end of his high school career. The end of volleyball, the end of home cooked meals, the end of walking to school with Oikawa everyday. 11:02. He needs to go to bed. Sighing, he pulls out his phone and stares at his most recent contact. He hesitates for a moment, before pressing the call button. It rings once, twice, and right before the third ring he hears the line connect. 

“Iwa-chan?”

Iwaizumi makes a grunt at this, but doesn’t say anything else, suddenly forgetting why he called in the first place.  “Hello? Are you there?”

“Yeah, I’m here.”

He can hear Oikawa give a small laugh in the background. It’s hollow, though, Iwaizumi notices. 

“Are you nervous too?” Iwaizumi doesn’t know where this question comes from, but he certainly knows this wasn’t the question he meant to ask. 

“Iwa-chan should know I never get nervous.” That hollow laugh is back, and it makes Iwaizumi’s stomach churn uncomfortably. This was definitely not the conversation he wanted to be having. He wonders if his own nervousness is seeping out of every word like he thinks it is. He tries to regain some sense of normalcy by saying, “Don’t be so shitty, everyone gets nervous, dumbass.”   


“So crude, Iwa-chan!”

“Well, whatever. I was going to say if you were nervous, you could come over. But if you’re not nervous-”

“Wait! Well, maybe coming over isn’t such a bad idea,” Oikawa says. Iwaizumi lets out  a small breath. That was the answer he was hoping for.    


“I’ll open the backdoor,” Iwaizumi says, and then hangs up. 

Walking downstairs from his room, he turns into the kitchen. The kitchen was compact, but connected to the dining room which housed a small table, meant for just Iwaizumi and his mom. Against the far wall was the backdoor. Once in the kitchen he grabs a small cup for water and goes over to the sink to fill it. As he watches the tap fill the cup, suddenly it hits him. He definitely doesn’t want Oikawa coming over.

There had been another small thought behind his worry for school, or maybe they were one in the same, he couldn’t tell for sure. But there had been another fear, the fear of losing Oikawa. Iwaizumi wasn’t stupid, he had recognized his feelings for Oikawa somewhere around his second year. Some might say even that was a little late for all the time they spent together. The late nights practicing, the sleepovers, all of the time spent at school. He knew it meant something different for him than it did for Oikawa. Oikawa, who relished in the attention of his fangirls. Oikawa, who couldn’t show more affection towards anyone than he could to a volleyball. But still, he felt a small fire in his chest when Oikawa chose to pay attention to him over everyone else. There were some days where even Oikawa’s little “Iwa-chan'' sent his heart racing. And he didn’t want to give any of that up.

Suddenly, as if someone had pushed him, Iwaizumi snapped back into reality out of the depth of his thoughts. The water was overflowing from the cup he was still holding under the tap. He looked at it for a second, before dumping the whole thing down the drain. Turning away from the sink, he started pacing, letting his thoughts overtake him again. 

Oikawa would be at the door any minute, and Iwaizumi was sure that he would not be able to compose himself. Oikawa could always tell exactly what he was feeling, and the idea of being called out on his crush put a pit in Iwaizumi’s stomach. He could picture Oikawa teasing him, laughing that if even Iwa-chan liked him then of course he must be amazing. But, at the same time, he knew that if he didn’t say something, his time would be quickly running out to make a move. Maybe if he confessed to Oikawa first, he would take it seriously. Maybe a proper confession would stun him into really thinking about it. 

Iwaizumi is knocked out of his thoughts for a second time by a slight tap on the door. He looks up from where he was staring at the floor to see Oikawa’s face peering into the window, his breath lightly fogging up the glass. Iwaizumi hurries over to the door to open it, cursing to himself. He had been so busy thinking about Oikawa coming over that he had forgotten to unlock the backdoor. Great fucking start. 

He quickly hurries to unlock the backdoor, letting Oikawa in. 

“I thought you said you would unlock it,” Oikawa says with a small chuckle. 

“Yeah, um, yeah sorry.” Iwaizumi isn’t looking at Oikawa as he says this, still too preoccupied with how he is going to confess. He pointedly avoids eye contact, because he thinks that if he looks at Oikawa before he is ready he might crack. 

“Are you okay Iwa-chan? I didn’t think you were actually that nervous.”

“I’m not nervous, idiot,” Iwaizumi says defensively. Of course he would call Oikawa an idiot right before confessing to him, what was wrong with him? He tries again, “Do you want some water or something?”

Oikawa laughs again, this time with an edge to it that Iwaizumi recognizes as annoyance, or maybe fear. They always seem to go together when it comes to him. “Now there must seriously be something wrong with you if you're actually trying to be a good host. Come on Iwa-chan, I won’t judge if you’re actually nervous for school. Not everyone can have nerves of steel like me.”

Iwaizumi realises that is the second time Oikawa has made that joke. He looks up, then, to say something to him but stops when he realizes how they’re standing. Oikawa is standing a few steps from the backdoor, his back facing it. Iwaizumi thought he was standing a respectable distance away, but is now realizing that he is much closer to Oikawa than he originally thought. There is maybe only half an arm length between them, and Iwaizumi can clearly see Oikawa’s face, and the false smirk that rests on his lips. 

Iwaizumi drops his voice low before saying, “I already told you I’m not nervous.” He hopes the quiet tone can hide the slight shake in his voice. His eyes can’t stop looking between Oikawa’s eyes and his lips. He knows that they’re too close for the movement to be subtle, but suddenly he can’t help himself. He knew this would happen. He never should have invited Oikawa over, his resolve was quickly crumbling. 

Oikawa looks stunned at the change in tone, and Iwaizumi can see his eyes tracking his own. He swallows thickly, but doesn’t say anything. Iwaizumi sees his pupils dilate, if even incrementally. 

“If you’re not nervous, then why did you invite me over,” Oikawa questions, his tone matching Iwaizumi’s. It seems that he has picked up on the shift in the conversation, but Iwaizumi still sees his curiosity written on his face. 

Iwaizumi steps imperceptibly closer, but Oikawa doesn’t move. They both look at each other for a moment, before opening their mouths at the same time. Iwaizumi’s confession dies on his lips as he suddenly darts forward to kiss Oikawa. Well that definitely wasn’t the plan. Before Iwaizumi can truly question his own actions, he is distracted by Oikawa kissing him back. He freezes for a moment, almost too shocked to move. It's only momentary however, as his brain jolts him to keep moving. 

Iwaizumi wraps his arms around Oikawa’s hips, while Oikawa moves his arms around his neck. Iwaizumi takes another step, effectively pinning Oikawa between himself and the door. He deepens the kiss, pressing Oikawa harder against the door. As they continue, the kiss grows more messy and unpracticed. Iwaizumi presses his tongue into Oikawa’s mouth, who gives him little resistance. After another moment Oikawa bites Iwaizumi’s lower lip, eliciting a small noise from him. The noise breaks the silence that had filled the kitchen before, and Iwaizumi pulls away. They both look at each other, lips red and slightly swollen, before coming back together. 

“Oikawa,” Iwaizumi says. “Can we go somewhere else?”

“Like where?”

“Like my room.”

Oikawa looks at him again, this time more critically. He seems to be making a decision in his head before grabbing Iwaizumi’s arm and dragging him up the stairs towards his room. Iwaizumi practically trips over his own feet trying to keep up with him.

Once in Iwaizumi’s room, Oikawa closes the door a little too loudly. 

“Hey, keep it down my parents are asleep.”

“I’m here all the time, it's fine.”

Iwaizumi levels a look at him. “Yeah, well, we don’t do this all the time.”

Oikawa at least has the decency to blush a little at the statement. Iwaizumi’s mind is still reeling from the recent developments, and before he really has any time to truly think about what’s happening, Oikawa is on him again. The kiss is twice as intense as it was in the kitchen, and Oikawa seems to be leading this time. Iwaizumi’s not exactly sure where the fire is coming from, but he certainly can’t find it within himself to complain. 

They slowly move their entangled form towards the bed, where Oikawa pushes him down before following on top of him. Iwaizumi pulls away, looking intently at Oikawa, but still smiling. He can’t believe this is truly happening. Has Oikawa liked him this whole time? If he has, why haven’t they done this sooner? Questions are running through his head a mile a minute. One of them being: who says Oikawa is going to be on top? With a lighthearted grunt, he flips Oikawa over so now he is leaning over him instead. 

“Okay then,” Oikawa says with a laugh. 

“Is this okay,” Iwaizumi asks seriously. He’s never really done anything with anyone before, and his nerves seem to be coming through again as more time is allowed to pass. 

“Yeah, it's okay,” Oikawa says a little softer. If Iwaizumi wasn’t so distracted with his nerves, and with the way Oikawa’s mouth looks slicked with both of their spit, he might have realized the smile he was giving him didn’t meet his eyes. He might have noticed how the response came a little too quickly. But the way Oikawa’s hands are moving down his chest is distracting him from thinking of _ anything  _ clearly, let alone the little imperceptible ways Oikawa usually reveals himself to Iwaizumi. 

“Do you have any lube?” Oikawa asks suddenly. 

The question shocks Iwaizumi out of his distracted headspace, sending him down an even darker tunnel of worry and confusion. A small pit forms in his stomach. 

“Lube?” He asks, mouth suddenly dry.

“Yeah, if we’re gonna hookup we’re gonna need it.”

Iwaizumi stares at Oikawa.  _ Hookup _ ? Who said anything about that? Iwaizumi was so lost thinking about the kissing, that he didn’t even realize the situation they were in. Alone in his room, parents asleep, with the hour nearing midnight. Is that what Oikawa wanted? 

It's not that Iwaizumi had never thought about sleeping with Oikawa. If he was honest, he thought about it a lot. He thought about it in the dark hours of the night, and when they were alone in the locker room showers, and any time Oikawa mentioned offhandedly that his parents weren’t home. But he never imagined it would be like this. Oikawa’s hands were drifting quickly downwards and Iwaizumi feels like he definitely didn’t have time to mentally prepare for this. He never imagined it feeling so rushed. 

Oikawa’s intensity takes a sharp incline, arching his back off the bed slightly to kiss Iwaizumi harder. Iwaizumi’s mind seems to be mush, as all he can think about is if it's okay to put his hands this far down Oikawa’s hips. Oikawa seems to be having no such issue as he reaches down and pulls Iwaizumi’s pants down quickly. His hands seem sure of their movements, seemingly moving towards one goal. Has Oikawa done this before? Before Iwaizumi can get swept up in that train of thought, Oikawa asks him, “Iwa-chan. The lube, do you have any?”

Shit. He really needed to get out of his head. This is what he wanted, wasn’t it? He needed to quit ruining it by thinking too hard. They were kissing and Oikawa wanted to have sex with him. This is a success if he’s ever seen one. Iwaizumi rolls over to his bedside table to grab his lube and the singular condom he received from an informative sex education lecture. He had kept it there in the vain hopes that one day he might need it. He holds them up to Oikawa, smiling. 

“Oh, Iwa-chan you’re prepared,” Oikawa says, smiling teasingly. “I’m surprised.”

“Well don’t be surprised, asshole.” Iwaizumi grumbles. Oikawa is eyeing the condom with amusement and Iwaizumi is starting to get the sinking feeling that he knows exactly where it's from. He needs to move this along. It dawns on Iwaizumi that he’s not exactly sure how to move this along.

“Oikawa,” Iwaizumi says softly, suddenly a little embarrassed. “I’ve never--”

“I know,” Oikawa interrupts. “But that’s okay. I’ll show you.”

“Okay,” Iwaizumi says, suddenly looking awkwardly off to the side. “Hey, Oik- Tooru. If we’re going to do this can you not call me Iwa-chan?” Iwaizumi knows he’s blushing now. But he also knows that there is no way he’s going to let someone, especially Oikawa, call him  _ Iwa-chan _ during his first time. 

Oikawa laughs at this. But it's not a mocking laugh, it's a genuinely soft laugh that reaches his eyes. He looks at Iwaizumi with what he can only assume is understanding. “Okay, Hajime.”

A thrill runs through Iwaizumi upon hearing his first name as Oikawa grips Iwaizumi’s hands in his own, and slowly moves them lower. Iwaizumi thinks he might pass out. Oikawa guides him around his body, careful to show him what feels good. Iwaizumi studies Oikawa as they do this, and he can tell that he is starting to get the hang of it. When Oikawa takes his hands away to grip Iwaizumi’s back, Iwaizumi is maybe a little too gentle, terrified of hurting him. It may be silly to be scared of breaking someone like Oikawa, but Iwaizumi is scared all the same. Oikawa corrects this quickly, though, and Iwaizumi wonders if this is something that gets better with repetition. 

Oikawa’s hands are much more skilled in comparison, something Iwaizumi sees clearly as they go. He seems to need no direction on where to put his hands, or what feels good, he just knows. Iwaizumi is sure that he won’t last long, not when Oikawa possesses the innate ability to know the exact techniques that send him quickly to the edge. He tries to hold out as long as possible; his obvious inexperience screams in his head. He wants Oikawa to at least think he’s worth his time, which is not a thought he has had before. But Oikawa seems to know so clearly what he is doing-- and how to last. 

Soon, much too soon Iwaizumi thinks, his resolve gives out, and he collapses next to Oikawa. Oikawa doesn’t let him rest though, not until he’s satisfied as well. Finally, they both lay together, exhausted. It’s all Iwaizumi has to not fall asleep right after, so instead he turns over to look at Oikawa. He looks just as exhausted, but his eyes are still open fractionally. 

Iwaizumi reaches a hand out, brushing Oikawa’s cheek gently and says, “You’re amazing. That was amazing.”

Oikawa leans into his touch and sighs, closing his eyes. “This was nice Iwa-chan.”

Iwaizumi smiles at Oikawa, warmth filling his chest. He’s almost about to shut his eyes when he hears Oikawa’s voice again. 

“This was a good idea, you know.”   


“What was?”   


“You know, this. Stress relief.”

Stress relief. The pit is back in Iwaizumi’s stomach, this time more like a black hole. An ever growing black hole that is about to swallow Iwaizumi right up in its dark pit of pain and suffering. What the hell did that mean? What was stress relief? Wasn’t this a confession?

Iwaizumi swallows. Hard. He’s about to say something, anything, but Oikawa shocks him again. 

“I’m glad you’re keeping this so casual.”

Iwaizumi can barely get the word out. “Causal?”

“Yeah, you know, just chill. This is just a one time thing, right?”

Iwaizumi looks at Oikawa, and he hopes his shock isn’t written in a neon sign right across his forehead. Oikawa is laying on his side, a little too far away from him. Every inch between them seems like a mile when the word ‘casual’ is spinning around Iwaizumi’s head. Iwaizumi wants to reach out and touch him, wants to understand what the fuck is going on. But Oikawa seems to be telling him exactly what’s going on. This is a one time thing, it’s just something to take the edge off, and it isn’t going to happen again. Their relationship is no different than it was this morning, at least according to Oikawa. 

That must be in his mind when he is possessed to say, “Yeah. Right. Just a one time thing.”

Oikawa seems to relax a little at his answer, and turns his back to go to sleep. Iwaizumi stares right between his shoulder blades, hoping Oikawa can’t hear the way he’s spinning out in his head. He knows that minutes ago he could barely keep his eyes open, but now he can’t force himself to make them close. He doesn’t know how he will ever sleep again when he knows all of his nightmares will be haunted with the same conversation, and the same two words being said over and over again. 

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! Please come bother me on my twitter @hellfirrre  
> Not sure about an update schedule but hopefully soon.


End file.
